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Because it’s so unrealistic to list all the possible ways a covertly aggressive individual can get the better of another person, I find it helpful to focus attention on the more common tactics CAs employ and to explain in depth why the tactics are so effective.Understanding the basics of how manipulation works gives the potential victim of covert-aggression a better intuitive grasp of the nature of troublesome encounters with all disturbed characters and heightens their sensitivity to the many possible tactics a manipulator might employ.Covertly aggressive people are among the most manipulative personalities.They use certain tactics to accomplish two things simultaneously: 1) conceal their aggressive intentions, and 2) invite you to fear, be doubtful, or optimally, to concede or give in.They use this tactic only when they know full well they’ve done something or plan to do something most everyone would regard as wrong.

Yet, every day she is by his bedside, holding his hand and talking to him.

Why are the elaborate “explanations” and justifications necessary if the person doesn’t realize how most people would judge their actions?

It’s not that they don’t know most folks would regard their behavior as wrong.

Let’s look at another tactic: A woman has been married to the same man for 40 years.

She has just rushed him to the hospital because, while they were out in the yard working, he began having trouble speaking and looked in some distress.




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If you slip and start speaking ill about your ex, your date might conclude that you're bitter.