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Women who have nerdy interests are frequently less traditionally “feminine”.Some were tomboys growing up and take pride in being one of the guys.Is it good or bad that people think that you appear intimidating. It's sad that these people will never get to know you due to their preconceived notions.Maybe good if you find yourself in a scary situation.Others were late bloomers or women who have had few female role models in their lives.Some women are just naturally more outgoing and rowdy; the loud group of party girls are a regular feature of many parties, bars, and club scenes.Instead, make a point of being approachable and friendly.Wide smiles that reach your eyes (the “Duchenne Smile”) and open, welcoming body language can make a shy or introverted guy feel more welcome.

After all, women are encouraged to be assertive, accomplished and independent; being told that they’re “intimidating” sounds like they’re being told to take all of that back and pretend to be something less than what they are. Are geek guys finding a woman’s accomplishments to be somehow threatening? Because “intimidating” is so subject to personal interpretation, I thought it was best to go to the source: geek guys.

Perhaps a better way to phrase this is…Sometimes people find me intimidating.

By using this phrase you can let other people keep their judgements or opinions of you, without making it who you are.

She’s well educated, with a rapier wit and a willingness to use it. And yet, Friday still remains the most lonely night of the week when she sees all of the happy, laughing couples making plans, having romantic dinners and enjoying the sex while she’s at home with Fringe on the DVR and a bottle of Malbec breathing in the kitchen. Well, whenever she’s interested in a guy – a guy who’s worth her time, because what’s the point of having standards if she’s not going to stick to ‘em?

She’s done it all; dating sites, meeting guys at cons, the comic store, chatting up friends from class and at work.




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What can we do to remedy this and make startup culture fairer for women?


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They’rekeeping their options open and are probably dating multiple people at once.