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Three college friends and I sat in a hotel lounge, chatting about our younger days. And, though none of us would admit it, we shared similar restlessness about finding the right man. “Why didn’t someone write the book on how to find the man of your dreams? We graduated from the same college, lived in the same dorm.However, a husband is responsible to lead his wife in sanctification, as this verse explains with the imagery of Christ and His bride.If a man cannot do that, he is not ready to be a husband.I am not implying that a man has to be a prude, but he is to be a protector.

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Paul writes in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong [defraud] his brother in this manner, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things…” God’s will is for your sanctification, which includes purity. If it is not, then he is a defrauder, who loves himself more than you or God. How does your date cope when things do not go as planned?

Does he spew his anger all over everyone, including you? Proverbs -25 says, “Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.” If you are not to make friendships with angry people, why would you covenant yourself to someone who fits this description? If he would more readily spend a day on the lake than helping someone in need, this indicates where his heart lies.

Proverbs makes it clear that you will only be ensnared. You may actually become an enabler who receives the brunt of his anger. Those little childlike qualities may seem really cute right now, but it will grow old (and aggravating) shortly into marriage. If a man is not responsible with his time, money, and work, why would he be responsible in his future family life? You should also consider your date’s relationships with other people.

It’s an good question that needs to be considered seriously. The same applies for sexual innuendo that is inappropriate before marriage.

If he is always broaching conversations about sex, he is not doing a good job of helping you to protect your mind against lust before marriage.




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Comedian-actress Dodie Goodman selected Vern Lanegrasse from the three unseen date contestants because she liked Vern's answers about cats in his Louisianan accent.


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Unfortunately, Adam Levine does not seem like the man to have mistresses, side girlfriends and fiancés.